Chapter 34

Gary's POV

Wiping away an escaped tear in frustration, feeling furious over the entire situation i scrunch up the newspaper throwing it into the bin, before marching upstairs carrying a roll of bin bags to the bedroom. Slamming open the bedroom door i dart straight away towards the wardrobe. Taking handfuls of Mark's clothes, i stuff them into a black bag carelessly. "Make a mug out of me, you stupid inconsiderate arsehole!" Once all of his clothes are crammed messily into a black sack, my eyes glance over to the his Chester draws- we both had a set each seeing as we've got more clothing than needed. Doing the same as before, i scoop out his underwear and socks using another bag to drop them into again. The bottom drawers contain electricals and paper work which appears to be stuck. Placing my feet either side of the wooden draw, i take a tight grip to the handle, pulling backwards. "Urrrgh. Come on! Come on you bloody thing!" A loud crack sound is made, as the draw is freed causing me to fall forcefully onto my back. "Arrrgh fuck!" Slowly i sit up looking at the broken piece of wood in my hands. On the floor i'm surrounded by scattered pieces of paper and random wires. Underneath a pile of paperwork something catches my eye, a black rectangular journal which is locked by a small padlock. Searching around the floor i look for a key, nothing. Mark is a worrier and a thinker, inside could contain a whole bunch of his thoughts and secrets... it could also contain what exactly happened the night he cheated.

Standing to my feet i take the journal downstairs with me. Walking to the kitchen i search through the cupboards, until i come across what i'm looking for. A hammer. Sitting the journal onto the work top, i correctly position the hammer hovering over the padlock. Taking a deep breath and a shaky hand i hit the hammer as hard as i possibly can onto the lock several times, until finally it breaks off. Sickness swirls around my stomach seeing the broken metal on the stone tiled floor. Anything could be written in here, months, years even of lies. Carrying the journal into the living room i quickly pull the curtains closed incase Robbie and Mark arrive and see me, there's still no chance i'm going with them i'll just make out that i've gone shopping or something, but for the mean time i'm going to snoop through Mark's journal. Nervously opening the first page it surprisingly dates back to 1990 with the caption First day of the interview for the new band. Flicking through a few of the pages i come to another date 1994- Today is getting worse, Robbie and Gary are a loggerheads again over vocals. It's only a few more weeks until we hit 1995 and i can't see Take That being a band of brothers for much longer. Robbie's my best friend and Gary... well... i've mentioned already half way through this what Gary means to me, not that he'll ever think the same back, for starters he's not even gay... i've already been through the embarrassment of being turned down over a drink...to be honest i can actually see Gary walking out sometime soon to start a solo career... then what? He's not going to look back and he's not going to look twice at me, this time next year he will probably be married to some sort of model. Who knew that working in the music industry and falling head over heels for your best friend could lead to such a stressful life?' Inhaling a deep breath i skip through even more pages until the more recent ones. This is honest proof of how blind i use to be. All of a sudden there's a loud knock on my front door's glass.

Without giving it a seconds thought, i quickly flee over the top of the sofa tightly holding the book against my chest. Where did the time go?! They're here already! Another knock sounds, this time only louder, much louder. The only reason i'm hiding behind the sofa is, because even though the curtains are closed, knowing Robbie he will probably end up breaking the door down. There's silence suddenly at the front of the house. Peering my head over the top of the sofa, i glance through the very thin gap in the curtains. Robbie is on his knees looking through the letter box. A figure sits in the passenger seat of the car, with his hands cupped over his face. Promptly i hide back behind the sofa. I haven't seen Mark since the break up... seeing him now is only going to make things worse. God he looks awful... from the colour of his skin to the noticeable weight loss. "No Gary. Stop it!" I think to myself feeling frustrated that in some way i'm starting to feel sorry for Mark, after everything he has done.
"Gary? Are you awake? We need to go." Robbie speaks in a bitter tone through my letter box, sending the hairs on the back of my neck to stand on ends. "Gary! Open this fucking door before i drag you out. Don't you dare start playing games on a day like this!" Curling up with the sofa throw over, i nuzzle against the wall still hiding. i continue to read Mark's journal, refusing to move.

Robbie's POV

"GARY!" Using the sole of my shoe, i kick against the front door. "Open this god damn door Barlow!"
"Robbie!" A small high pitched voice calls behind me. "What are you doing?!" Looking over my shoulder, i notice Mark hanging out of the car window looking at me with nothing, but a pure look of worry filling his face. Great, if today isn't hard enough for him it's just got a whole lot harder. Taking one more look at the front door i shake my head in a disappointed way, before walking back up the pathway towards the car. "What's happened? Is...Is...he ok?" Not wanting to upset him anymore than he already is, i glance at his tear stained face whilst getting back into the car. "...He's...he's not...coming...is...is he?" Mark sniffs, i can feel his heart shatter all over again. Hopefully spending a month in this clinic it will do him some good... both of them, time is all they need, and i'm sure Gary will feel guilty after all of this especially once i've finished with him.
"...We better go... time's ticking and i want to make sure you'll be ok." Mark doesn't say a word or noise, instead he just fastens his seat belt, allowing his head to rest on his fist whilst we begin to pull away from the house.

After over an hour's worth of driving, we finally arrive at the clinic. It's the furthest i've driven seeing as it's just been over a week since i got my driver's license. In front is a posh looking building, it almost looks like an office crossed with a hotel, noticing the huge glass windows down one side. "Wow... look at this place... fancy living here myself!" Smiling gently over to Mark, he doesn't even bother looking, as he stays in the same position which he has stayed in during the entire journey here. "Mark...? Are you feeling ok? You're not car sick are you? You do look a little peaky..." Sympathetically i move a hand to the direction of his cheek, instantly he moves out of contact. Seeing Mark look and act like this only gets me even more angry with Gary, i might even pay him a visit on the way back home... "...I'll get your bags." Stepping out of the car, i open the boot of the car pulling out Mark's medium sized suit case along with some extra shoulder bags. Nervously, Mark helps himself out of the car using his crutches. His eyes immediately focus onto the building reading the words 'hospital' on a sign near the car. Closing his eyes for a brief moment he steadily breathes, allowing all this to sink in gradually. "...Ready?" Placing a supportive hand onto his back, i look at his surprisingly calm facial expression.
"Ready..."

Walking inside the electronic doors, we are greeted by a friendly looking lady who's smartly dressed behind the reception desk. "Ah.. you must be Mr Owen?" She reaches for a clip board, which she brings over to us. "I just need to sign a few things to show that you've signed into your room." Handing Mark a pen, we both stare at his vague looking face.
"Erm...Mark? You just need to sign those two pages, mate..." Wrapping an arm around his shoulder, i gently squeeze it.
"Y...Yeah... certainly." He carelessly signs his signature, before handing it back to the woman.
"Right... so now that's out the way i can happily take you to your room." She waves over a gentleman who's standing at the side of the reception desk, he walks over to us taking Mark's bags from me. The woman turns back over to me, as her smile fades. "I'm sorry sir... but visiting times are over, so you wont be able to come with us, but you're always welcome to ring and book appointments anytime you like within the visiting hours. If that's ok with Mr Owen we can arrange that straight away for you."
"Er...right...ok... well... i'll have to sort it out with my wife, but i'll be back tomorrow morning say around... 10am, if that's ok?"
"Of course. I'll pencil you down, as soon as we've taken Mr Owen to his room."
"It's...it's Mark..." Quietly he mumbles, as the colour begins to drain even more from his tired looking face, he notices an older looking man sat in a corner of the corridor being dragged away by some doctors.
"Sorry...Mark. We better get you taken to your room, dinner is almost ready and it looks as if you could do with a warm meal inside of you." She delicately places a hand onto his back, whilst guiding him towards the lift.
I'll... i'll be back to visit you tomorrow, Mark... i promise." Feeling sick seeing Mark weakly limp away from me, it almost feels like sending a child to school for the very first time with the amount of worry i'm feeling right now.

Taking a sharp intake of breath, i turn to the direction of the doors, at the same time dipping into my pocket for my car keys. Out of nowhere a loud scream from within the building catches my attention, causing me to freeze. "ROBBIE! ROBBIE! COME BACK PLEASE!"
"Mark?!" Running back inside, i notice Mark laying on the floor with his crutches either side of him.
"DON'T GO!" Loudly he cries, wrapping his arms around his head. "I NEED GARY! I Need him so badly..."
"...Mark..." Guilt runs through my body, as i crouch beside him. "Come here... everything is going to be ok..." Lifting his head towards my chest, i wrap my arms tightly around him, embracing him into a hug. "Everything will be ok... i promise..." Gently i kiss his sweaty forehead, as he breaks down in my arms. "Ssshh..."
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After an hour of trying to calm Mark down, i finally head home again... this time alone. Seeing Mark break down like that brings thoughts into my head, not just any kind of thoughts, but revenge seeking thoughts. Driving down Gary's road i park a few houses away from his. An image of Gary sitting comfortably at home watching tv, whilst laughing at what Mark's going through, begins to make my blood boil. Gary needs to be taught a lesson for what he's done too. On that note, i slam my car door shut, before marching back down the pathway to Gary's house. At first i knock in a normal mannered way. The curtains are still closed like they were hours ago i turned up here. There's no answer, so i decide to knock a little louder. A loud smash from inside the house sounds. Clearly he's in there and just avoiding me, well not for much longer he isn't going to. Stepping backwards slightly, my foot hits against the door trying to force it open. Three, four, five times i powerfully kick it, until it finally swings open. "GARY?! I know you're in here, i can almost smell the guilt coming off you." Noticing a shadow in the kitchen, i shuffle along the laminate pushes open the kitchen door. Gary releases a gasp whilst looking up at me from the table.
"Y...You're not allowed in here." Wiping away his tears he closes a small notebook on the table.
"Don't you fucking dare tell me what i can and can't do, not after what i've had to go through today. Do you know where i've just been?" Frowning my eyebrows at him, he avoids eye contact with me. "I'm talking to you! You very well know where i've been, but do you give a damn? Of course you don't, you self centred jerk!"
Sighing deeply, he cups his hands over his face. "H...How...did he take it?" He mumbles softly against his palms.

"How did he take it?! What do you mean how did he take it?! Did you expect him to happily skip through those doors? You brainless idiot. He broke down... over you, and you couldn't even be decent enough to come along to see him off. What kind of person are you? Was you born without a heart or something?!"
"He...He cheated on me... how else am i suppose to act?"
"So he made a mistake which he clearly regrets. Take a good look in the mirror and remember that you was once in his position... with my wife. You're nothing but a hypocrite."
Gary lifts his head laughing slightly. "You're actually comparing the pair of us? Are you forgetting he's got a son after his quickie, eh? The further away he is the better."
"Wow... you really are a heartless prick aren't you? You almost ended up getting a child too after your affair. At least Mark's was just a shameful, drunken one night stand. Yours was on going, lying through your teeth just for a sex wasn't it? AND in my bed! So don't you dare."
"Oh yeah? And what are you going to do. Just because you've lost your family doesn't mean you should come and interfer with mine." Not saying a word, i just stare at his smug looking face. "...S'up Rob...? Cat got your tongue? You really think Eleanor wants to have a father like you in her life? As soon as she's understanding more about you... she'll be happy to get rid of her lying, cheating, scumbag of a fath-" Gary forcefully hits the floor, as my fist crashes against his jaw.

"Oh yeah?! You wanna say that again, do you?" Grabbing hold of Gary's shirt, i push him with all my energy against the wall. "He poured his heart out to me again today. Over some waste of space like you!" Pulling back my fist again, i hit it serveral times into Gary's face
"GET OFF ME!" Yelling loudly, Gary tries to protect his face from my punches. Throwing him onto the floor again, i straddle his lap gripping to his head.
"Do you understand what he's going through?! He might of been the one who cheated and i don't bloody blame him!" Hitting my hand across his face, a loud slapping sound echoes around the kitchen from the flesh on flesh. "You broke his ribs, you tore out his heart and now you're threating to take his unborn child from him?!" Holding either side of Gary's head, i slam it against the floor.
"ROBBIE PLEASE!" Gary begs, as he coughs loudly from the blood coming from his mouth.
"God help you if you don't visit him in that clinic... it wont just be a light beating next time..." Standing to my feet i notice the notebook still resting on the table. Gary lays weakly on the floor, still coughing. Reaching for the notebook i angrily toss it into the filled soapy sink.
"N...N...nooooo!" He holds his hand out into the direction of the sink which is just inches away.
"Remember what i've said, yeah? Scum." I shake my head taking a look at the messy body laying in front of me. Saying nothing else i spit in his face, before walking away.